Friday, December 18, 2020

CONSPIRACY THEORY


 Trump is working with Putin. This is why Russia was so eager to get him into office in the first place. They first agreed to work together when Trump was in Russia leering at naked Beauty Pageant contestants and urinating with hookers on the bed Obama slept it. Putin could see that Trump had no morals which made him a perfect foil for his plans. Here was someone who could easily be bought and already owed Russia millions in loans he couldn't get from any U.S. bank. So he promised Trump freedom from repayment, the right to build a Trump Moscow and sanctuary if Americans ever caught on. So, they continued to plot in secret, with many private meetings, not just in Hamburg n 2017. (The press was so intimidated by Trump they never asked enough questions about this cozy relationship.) Then, by sheer luck, the virus arrived. Since neither Trump nor Putin had any interest in saving American lives, Trump ignored its impact. And it solved so many problems for Putin. It destroyed America's economy and the president's lack of response made America look weak. But still Putin wasn't getting what he paid for: the lifting of sanctions on Russia and reinstatement in the G7 and a variety of oil schemes. But Trump did assure Putin if he ever overtook America, all the Republican Senators were on his side for the right price. But Putin told Trump it wasn't enough. And, Trump, ever the liar said it would take another term as President to make all of Putin's dreams come true. And he swore that he had buffaloed millions of Americans who he was sure were stupid enough to vote for him. He was right. But he didn't count on how many more Americans wanted Trump gone. Now that Trump is powerless, Putin is furious because he blames it on Trump's stupidity and his own confidence in this moron.  And Trump is terrified because he not only faces a raft of criminal charges, and the possibility of prison, but he has to worry about Putin's wrath, repaying the myriad millions he owes Russia and the possibility of someone poisoning one of his Big Macs.  All right this is all foolish and unbelievable. Or is it? 

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