I can't decide what I consider the best and worst ads of the past year. I have never seen so many lame commercials, messages that I couldn't understand, productions that seemed to have nothing to do with the product, poor grammar, pathetic attempts to use a pun designed to be heard as a swear, incredibly vulgar commercials for toilet paper and air fresheners, consumers dancing or singing rapturously over products as ordinary as bottled water or cream cheese, and insurance company commercials shown endlessly when they were boring the first time. I do know the commercial I hated the most: It was the talking car from Alfa Romeo: Julia or Betty or whatever the hell the name of the red sports model was who insisted: "You were looking for me." There were moments I liked in commercials. The few seconds when one kid says, "Is this a lug wrench, and the other answers 'maybe" but don't ask me why. I also like the kid who approached his parents in bed to admit to a "minor" car accident. There was a commercial for the pharmaceutical industry, but I only saw it once but was impressed. This is odd since I despise the pharmaceutical industry. I don't know if it's true, but I recently heard that the United States is the only country allowed to advertising prescription drugs. Did I have a favorite prescription drug ad? Absolutely not.
Sunday, February 11, 2018
Saturday, January 20, 2018
the government's constantly flouting of the Constitutions ruling against the separation of church and state. When Trump repeatedly says 'God Bless America' you can be pretty sure he means the Christian god, the one his fans believe in, and which I am sure he doesn't, being an lifelong atheist himself. We know of course that Pence is a narrow-minded evangelical zealot, as are most of the oh-so-white members of Congress, thus they ignore the existence of any other religion but their own. And while they bow their heads at illegal prayer meetings they are working out new ways to send many true Christians and Muslims back to lives of misery, loneliness and deprivation and finding sneaky ways to reward the rich and moneylenders thus spitting in Jesus's face. So I'm pissed. Partly because it's illegal to promote their religion, any religion. And partly because it's hypocritical. Of course, not to mention that I don't want any national problems to face solution by prayer, but by intelligent discussion with leading experts not some obese narcissistic naif. We must take bullying Christians off the public playing fields, town halls, Congress and everywhere where the separation of church and state applies. If you really believe in your faith, you don't need to express it in places where it is not welcome or legal, you don't need to demand that others accept your religion and no other. You live in America. Start acting like it. And that goes for you too, Godless Trump.
Friday, January 19, 2018
Thursday, January 18, 2018
Another major fraud is febreze which does not in any way "eliminate" odors, but merely covers them up like every other air freshener. Tut tut. On the commercial, a single Swiffer cleans up the messiest messes, but, in reality, it takes only a minute for each costly pad to become filthy and require a replacement. The Black & Decker lithium powered vac I bought died from exhaustion after only three or four cleanups. I like Mucinex. but it isn't close to the miracle drug presented on TV. Those are just a few of the thousands of ads which we are exposed to every week which no authority
checks for accuracy. Of course one of the problems is that many consumers will continue to praise a product even after it has failed them. Those are the deceptive ads.Then there are the ones I don't even understand; the ones that are poorly written; the ones that are incredibly vulgar (there's febreze again!);the products that will make you sexier and imbue you with a sense of adventure (most car ads); and the endless pitches for products such as those that will cure your acne, but destroy your immune system, give you thoughts of suicide and possibly lead to cancer. As an advertising copywriter for 40 years, I'm probably more critical of today's excessive advertising than most viewers. I'll try to be less critical and suspicious. But I'll tell you this: I haven't tried Oxiclean, but I'm pretty sure it's not going to remove stains as miraculously as it does on TV.
Wednesday, January 17, 2018
I'm sure every American is proud today to know that our septuagenarian president is in, according to his doctor, "excellent shape". Just looking at this photo shows you the kind of athletic build the POTUS can boast about. He is so healthy he has grown more than an inch since taking office, and those nasty bone spurs that kept him from defending his country have disappeared. Also, god bless him, he is that rare person who can live on Big Macs, and KFC and still maintain superb health and enviable body mass as you can see. True the only exercise he gets is stepping in and out of a golf cart during his endless games, but look at his Adonis-like physique. There is no question that Dr. Jackson was completely accurate in his evaluation of our beloved leader. With his health being this good, we can be pretty sure Trump's boundless energy will allow for lots more partying with porn stars in his future.