"Do I look like I care?"

Image is everything. Take Ted Cruz.  He's that everyman running around the Midwest in jeans and plaid shirts. Of course his name isn't Ted. It's Rafael. And he really isn't an everyman since every man doesn't graduate from Princeton University and go on to the Harvard Law School. Every man doesn't have a wife who was a higher up in Goldman, Sachs and  Company. And it isn't every man that gets to work with George Bush to help steal the presidency from Al Gore.  Rafael's wife, Heidi also did her part for that gang of war criminals by working in the White House for Condoleeza Rice. And while Rafael is proud to drag out his two daughters to make smarmy remarks about president Obama, he never mentions his own parents. I'm sure they were lovely people even though they were both married twice. And unlike Rubio's parents they were not among the hard-working poor, but highly educated. In fact Rafael had two half sisters: Roxanna and Miriam. Sadly Miriam had several brushes with the law for theft and public intoxication and died of a prescription drug overdose. None of this is anything to be ashamed of, of course, unless you're trying to convince that average Americans that you, too, are an average American. In which case you might just as well ditch the jeans, which look dopey on you anyway, and instead of those tacky plaid shirts, wear a very expensive figure-flattering suit which you can easily afford.