WHAT DID DONALD DO?

We all know that Donald Trump is a narcissist, a liar, a cheat, a fraud, and lots of other loathsome things. But his recent "wiretapping" obsession seems over the top even for someone as paranoid as him.  I wonder why. Is it possible that he is concerned that any surveillance of Trump Tower will reveal something even more deranged, despicable and demented than anyone suspects? Is that why he cannot rest until he is absolutely sure that secret information has not been discovered and rests with someone who might expose his shocking, and possibly criminal, secret to the world? Was it something that happened on the fruity brocade sofa with the solid gold piping? Or did it occur on the garish Oriental rug in which Iranian workers stitched his name throughout the design? Or was it just something he confessed in private to someone ever sicker than he is, you know like  Giuliani, while Rudy was lounging around the apartment in a designer gown, platinum wig and a necklace Donald bought him at Tiffany's? Did Donald, while admiring himself in the Marie Antoinette mirror admit something to his reflection when he thought he was alone? Or maybe he was recorded by a camera hidden on one of the rococo statues in a bathroom while he was in the shower, flagellating  himself and saying, "You're a bad, bad boy. A worthless bad boy."