I think it's very important to fix problems that exist in this country. That's why I am a Democrat. But even I have to admit that if you're anxious to fix problems that don't exist, the Republican party should be your choice. All over America Republican state legislators are enacting laws to prevent voter fraud, which is one of the most egregious problems that doesn't exist. Very few people realize that in the past ten year there have been 340 cases of voter fraud throughout the whole country. You can imagine what a non-problem that is in a nation of 300 million people and why the Republicans have spent so much time and money to remedy this artificial situation. With Republicans in office there is no end to the problems they can fix which do not exist and never have. They could outlaw couples having sex on the mattresses at retail outlets. They could forbid city dwellers for operating pig farms on their patios. Laws could be passed to make cribs non-smoking zones. And with enough Republican backing they could prevent intergalactic marriages between Martians and humans. No question about it: Republicans are the ideal choice to attack and conquer non problems, address non issues, and introduce the essential non sequiturs to keep our flag flying high in April. So if you are a Republican voter with the proper photo i.d. who doesn't give a damn about the Constitution and the right of every citizen to vote, show your strong support for causes that need no support, elect Willard "Get those blacks out of our voting booths" Romney.
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