The affair of the fan.

I love Charlie Crist and certainly hope he is our next governor. But I must admit he has not done his homework. How could he not know that Martians have a legendary aversion to fans? Actually all extra-terrestrials like Rick Scott (Grock) are terrified of anything that spins, which is why no fans are allowed in his presence and what caused the scandal last August when a seven-year-old girl was arrested by a security guard for carrying a pinwheel. Nobody knows the origin of this phobia. Some have suggested that a spinning object interferes with the sensitive visual capabilities of his tryopic buggy eyes. Others think that his super sensitive brachiopodal ears hear the spinning not as a quiet whirr but as a violent and threatening roar. Whatever the case, Charlie should have done more research. Keep in mind that, when angered, Rick Scott is capable of rotating his head and spitting deadly streams of hot acid.