putt..putt...putt

While most modern cities are striving to improve their rapid transit systems, Miami is working feverishly to weaken theirs. Already they have replaced fast, comfortable, spacious, quiet buses with slow, cramped, wooden-benched trolleys. The drivers of these trolleys, for the most part, speak only one language, Spanish, which would, I think, prove a major problem in an accident. That accident is very likely since many of these drivers engage in animated conversations with the Hispanic commuters packed behind them. They often have to shout because these drivers are also permitted to play, at a loud volume, any music of their choice. Therefore if you're an Anglo who likes classical music, you may have to spend a half an hour in cramped discomfort listening to the local Hispanic rock station. You might ask why do the residents of Miami put up with this? Because, unlike the buses, the trolleys are free.Why? I have no idea. There are still buses, of course, but they don't run as often or make as many stops. Not that the trolleys are all that dependable. But you know when one is coming. You can hear it.

A new low for the GOP.

What more proof do you need that the Republican party has completely lost its mind, its direction and what little honor it had than that this creature was a guest speaker at the Republican Leadership Conference?  Yes, indeed, this hirsute, homophobic, racist, and probably odorous madman was invited to speak on Thursday. Just what the Republicans needed for their image, another hypocritical religious nutcase named Robertson.  In typical satanic style he promotes "getting godly" while he vilified the White House and anything that doesn't suit his warped ideology.  I hope the Republicans had lots of febreeze and Lysol laid in for this conference.

Putting Cheney to good use.

Dick Cheney, who looks a decade older than his 73 years seems to be devoting his last years to vilifying our president, justifying his monumental errors, and making full use of his stolen heart as he flits from one anti-American talk show to the next. The latest being Sean Hannity, about as low a person on the ethical totem pole as you can find. No matter, Hannity is a nothing. And Dick Cheney ultimately has made certain that his career adds up to nothing but war mongering and treasonous lies for which he will never be punished. No matter, he looks weak, and will probably not be around much longer. I hope that when he dies, he is not cremated. I would like to believe that he will be buried in a grave in Washington or Wyoming. If so, I think it will become one of the world's most popular urinals.

Artful.

Like the Suburu commercial of several years back in which the young child was about to drive off to college, this commercial hits all the right notes. Surprising that a commercial for chewing gum could find such a touching theme and execute it so beautifully without ever being maudlin. I don't often accept that advertising is an art form, but when I see commercials this good, I have to question myself.

The world of nobodies.

There's a very dangerous world out there: The world of nobodies. These are angry, insignificant people who have absolutely nothing to offer in the way of talent, personality, or character. So the only way they can ever be recognized is by shooting up schools, being serial rapists, or committing other serious crimes. Or as we saw today, connecting their insignificance to someone important, like the idiot who punched Brad Pitt at the premier of Maleficent. Apparently this cipher couldn't bear to be just another person on the wrong side of the barricades, so having no other way to ever be recognized he opted for violence. Unlike all the compliant media in the world, I will not give this creature what he wants, which is having his name in print. Sadly the media are so lazy, they are only too happy to encourage this kind of madness by covering the story, providing photos of the nobody, and doing follow-up stories on all the news channels. Therefore the nobody has won. Even if he has to pay with jail time. He wanted to be a somebody, if only for an hour, if only because he committed a crime. And look at all the people who were willing to oblige.

The sour note song of the sore loser.

Thank goodness Romney was never elected president. Because he's the worst thing a man can be: a coward.  He is a petulant, super wealthy failure as a politician, as a man.  His frequent disproved lies about Obama were the apron strings of his failed campaign. Today, being a sore loser, he leaps at any opportunity to unjustly attack our president, the Veteran's scandal being his latest opportunity to express false outrage, and pretend caring about our servicemen. Romney is not a patriot who seeks ways to help the administration, who is ready to work towards bipartisanship, who can accept that the best man won and work with him. No. Like so many Republicans, he is a petty, sniveling, schoolyard tattletale type, eager to gossip, spread rumors and scatter invective wherever he goes. Romney is the bullet that we so fortunately dodged.

Scot free

There is no question that Bush and Cheney committed war crimes. The question is why are they allowed to get away with these crimes when others who are guilty of far less offenses are in prison? I don't know why the parents, spouses, and relatives of the thousands of Americans who died in Iraq or after coming home are not demanding justice for their loved ones. Do they think that because they held public office, these two war criminals are above reproach? They're not. So while so many Americans are mourning the loss of their war dead every day, every birthday, every holiday, Bush and Cheney are dining in fancy restaurants, taking exciting vacations, being asked to speak at Republican events, and even being quoted in the media as if their opinions had any value. I wish somebody would get on the stick and stick these two monsters into jail cells.

Don't people re-read what they write?

Johnny Depp Looks Unrecognizable as James 'Whitey' Bulger in "Black Mass"
I hate headlines like this from today's Huffington Post. If he is unrecognizable, then he doesn't look unrecognizable: he is unrecognizable.  HuffPost has some of the worst grammar, laziest writers, and stupidest headlines I've ever seen from any popular news publication. Where do they get these reporters?
If they're not making errors like this, they are creating stupid games or trying to create an article on nostalgia that suggests they have no awareness of the past.

A Burr on the ass of Congress.

Once again Congress has placed another idiot in a position for which is completely unqualified, both mentally and morally. Senator Richard Burr, a ranking member of the Senate Committee on Veteran's Affairs showed that he has no interest, no empathy  and no patience with the needs of veterans. Like most Republicans he has, of course, never served. So basically he's just another empty suit, unsuited to hold his job. During a hearing from veterans, Burr left the hearing for much of their testimony and later wrote an open letter scolding hem for not calling for the resignation of VA Secretary, Eric Shinseki. When are we going to have responsible adults heading up important government positions?

Sorry, Scrappy.

It gives me no pleasure to hear that Scrappy, the dog caught on tape earlier this month biting the leg of a  4-year-old, has been put to death.Tara, the cat, who rescued the boy from Scrappy deserves all the praise she has received. But Scrappy, like any dog, is only as good or bad as he is raised to be. I would be much more satisfied to hear that his careless owners were euthanized.

Please say, "no" to this idea.

Almost 40 years ago when I lived in Boston, I was a copywriter at Ingalls Advertising. One of the accounts I worked on was Springfield Institution for Savings. When we had to come up with a new campaign we were hardly inspired, and eventually came up with a series of ads and radio spots based on the theme, "We say yes." The point being, of course, that while other financial institutions can be resistant and cold, we at SIS are warm and agreeable.  Even at the time I knew that it was a theme that was false,trite, tired, and not worthy of us. But the account executive seemed to like it, and we did it up nicely. Then we all piled into the car and drove off to Springfield, Mass. to present it. It was a disaster. The client despised the idea, and rightly so. They hated it so much, we didn't even get to present its executions and were sent off to, hopefully, come up with something better. I still blush when I remember that day. And I have many reasons to remember it. Because here we are four decades later, and agencies are still using versions of that horrible "We say yes" concept. Shown above is just one such commercial.

Nothing to be proud of.

There are two really annoying aspects regarding the death of Donald Levine the creator of G.I. Joe action figures. One, that he's being praised at all for creating a doll that only foments in children the desire to go to war and kill, kill, kill. The other is how stupidly the media fall in line with the insanely cliche appellation, "the father of G.I. Joe". Sorry Donald Levine died of cancer. But I don't think creating a war doll is a good reason to show respect to someone. He lived till 86. So many of the real G.I. Joes didn't even live till 20.

I admit it. I don't understand the new Planters' commercials at all. I find them illogical, idiotic ramblings that have absolutely no relation to the product. But that seems to be a trend today as there are fewer and fewer art directors and copywriters who have any wit, whimsy or intelligence. Sadly the sponsors are just as idiotic and quick to buy anything that they think is "cool" when it's really brainless.

Not available anywhere.

I do not live in a free country. I am forced to listen to someone else's taste in music everywhere I go: every store, restaurant, shopping area, coffee shop, and, in Miami, even on public transportation. I am not interested in contemporary rock, rap music, country, or even jazz. Still I am required to be exposed to those forms hours every day against my will. My interests mean nothing. I must listen to what others choose, often at too loud a volume, even when I am paying to be in the environment. For some reason no  one ever plays classical music or standards. But I don't want those either. I want the joy, the pleasure, the calming serenity of silence. But silence is absolutely forbidden in today's society. Every business must have some kind of music, whether you like it or not. So please don't say to me, "It's a free country" because actually it isn't.

Arsonist goes down in flames.

What I love about Benghazi,
Which was tragic of course,
Is it makes Issa act
Like the ass of a horse.
He's nothing but whining
And petulant drama
In trying to shame Clinton
And damage Obama.
Yet all of his probes
Into the "crime" of Benghazi
Have only created
His own Kamikaze.

Ludwig, the mad queen of Hysteria.

What's most amazing about Fox News is not that they say so many stupid things and are such transparent liars, but that they aren't even embarrassed by their own madness. The latest of their insanities is airing tv psychotherapist Dr. Robi Ludwig's feelings about Elliot Rodger, who killed six people in Santa Barbara this Friday. She feels the 22-year-old was expressing his rage because he was fighting "homosexual impulses". Only a network as nutty as Fox would air such an armchair absurdity by a bat shit crazy homophobic loon like Ludwig. I wonder if she thinks that John Wayne Gacy, the killer clown, who sexually molested and murdered 33 young boys was fighting his "heterosexual impulses."

Note: Apparently this moron later gave an apology as idiotic and lame as her original comment.

A photo worth framing.

I am delighted to hear that three matadors were gruesomely injured by bulls during a May 20th bullfight in Madrid. These injuries resulted in the San Isidro festival being suspended for the first time in 35 years. I won't even pretend I feel sorry for these nasty narcissistic animal abusers in their glittery kitschy costumes.  Actually I wish the injuries had been far more agonizing.  But even the most painful death won't make up for all the bulls who have been tormented, stabbed and eventually murdered to delight the sadistic assholes sitting in the stands and yelling "ole". I rejoice in every wincing pain, every pint of spurting blood and every ugly lifelong scar given to these cowards  by truly brave bulls who, I am sure, were not allowed to live after winning in combat.

MADE IN CHINA

More than 1,000 dog deaths have been blamed on toxic jerkey treats from, where else, China? We have got to stop purchasing "Made in China" products, particularly anything we or our pets ingest. This kind of dire scenario is not rare. Many other foodstuffs from China have been confiscated, as well as toxic toys. I can only imagine how much heartbreak was caused by the deaths of these animals all because some kindly pet owner gave them a treat sent over here without enough inspection. Not that "Made in the USA" is a guarantee of safety. With our loose production codes, a product could still contain ingredients sourced from China and other countries that we know nothing about. Yesterday I nearly bought a skillet at Big Buys, but realizing that almost everything in that chain comes from China, I checked the country of origin. China. No thanks. From now on I buy only Made in America products.

Yuk.

Antonin Scalia is 78, incredibly overweight, and unashamedly partisan. Except for Clarence Thomas, he's about the worse thing that could happen to the Supreme Court. Oh, well, at least he has the decency to look as repulsive as he is.

Not on my bucket list.

As an atheist I am, of course, wildly intolerant of magical thinking.  Besides finding religion about as illogical as Santa Claus, I resent that it is responsible for so many of the world's ills.  (Yes, I know sincerely religious people do wonderfull things in the world.) But there is one expression used by the "believers" that I find especially irritating. It is what they say when someone who had a perfectly contented life is murdered or dies in some other horrible way, "She's in a better place." What better place? The grave. Or do they really imagine that the deceased man or woman is floating around in some kind of paradise which they, naturally, cannot describe. People are probably fortunate to be put all their responsibilities into one deity's hands and actually believe that something neat is going to happen even after they're dead. I find at astonishing that anyone, much less millions of people, can be so delusional based solely on something they learned as children. Plus, how arrogant it is to think you are so important that a deity is concerned with your every move.

On example of the insanity of religion: Singer Toni Braxton had an abortion in 2001. Being a magical thinker, she felt guilty because she had broken god's law. Later when she gave birth to a son who was autistic she believed it was god's punishment for her "unforgivable" act. So this talented woman spent years of emotional suffering because she believed that some magical figure was actually watching her every move and doling out punishment.

A boom box with aisles.

Despite its slogan, shopping at Publix is not a pleasure. For starters they play only one kind of music—
Contemporary Crap—and they play it loud. Worse, they seem to have an affection for songs with a single lyric line repeated more than 50 times. Today I completed all my shopping while some mediocre singer whined "Say what you mean. Mean what you say." over and over and over and over again. Publix apparently thinks that all their customers are between the ages of 12 and 26 and have no musical taste. Music aside, there are other non-pleasurable aspects to Publix. For instance, while they have many pleasant and competent people on staff, others cannot speak nor understand English and those who can have no idea where anything is. I am often sent to three different aisles before finding the item I need. But, alas, it is the nearest grocery store and since I don't drive I will be forced to deal with their failings and listen to their low-brow musical choices.

Donald and Rochelle, Rochelle.

I would guess most people have the fantasy that if they were rich, they'd be happy. Maybe. I personally think if you're happy, being rich might make you happier, but if you're unhappy rich isn't going to help much. But regardless, when you think how great life could be if you had millions, no billions, of dollars, think about Donald Sterling and his wife Shelley. Have ever seen two more miserable-looking people?

If you think there is equality of the sexes, try this. When you see a commercial like this one for V-8 vegetable juice, imagine the same spot with the roles reversed. I'm guessing if she were doing sit-ups and he hit her in the head, the commercial would have a whole different tenor. See how this reversal affects many other  television commercials. You'll be surprised.

Travelers.

Travels with Charley: In Search of America by John Steinbeck, as you may know, is his narration of a 1960 road trip around the United States with his standard poodle, Charley. In reading it, I am wildly impressed with his fascinating observations about people and the country as it was then. I suspect it's very different now. One thing that's different is a Kindle. While it's an easier way to read a book, it's also disheartening not to be able to underline or highlight his many brilliant observations. The one I just read on the bus coming home is, at the same time, so obviously true, yet so necessary to remember. Earlier in the book, Charley has trouble relieving himself and seemed to be in some pain. Steinbeck rushed through some Montana scenery to get him to the nearest vet. Sadly the man was lazy, incompetent, and cold-hearted and Charley was still mostly uncomfortable. He became sick when they reached Amarillo. This time Steinbeck found a young doctor who was intelligent, compassionate and eminently capable. He treated Charley with tenderness and respect and cured him of his problem, providing pills to make sure it never recurred. Naturally Steinbeck was grateful and the line he wrote is a truism we should always keep in mind: "There is nothing that can replace a good man."

Note: Obviously this applies to a good woman as well, to any person who is capable, empathetic, good-hearted and worth crossing paths with.

One fireman too many.

Why  would Alka Seltzer introduce a fireman commercial for heartburn when Zantac has had a cartoon fireman spokesman for over a year now. This doesn't speak very well for Alka Seltzer's agency's originality and creativity. Is it even possible that the agency's creative team isn't aware of the Zantac commercials?

"I can turn you off."

Call me a Luddite, which I am, but I don't really understand cyberbullying (despite the fact that I think nobody is more despicable and cowardly than a bully, any bully).  I mean how is possible? Can't you choose what you view on the Internet? So why would you be exposed to something that is insulting to you unless you deliberately went to that site? As much as I hate and avoid Facebook, it seems to be that you chose who you wanted to be friends with and could avoid those you didn't. So why are so many young people bullied by their peers? I don't get it, and I'd like to.

Message to a grateful nation.

On Thursday, Christine "I am not a witch" O'Donnell told the News-Journal that she would "rather slam my hand in a car door" than run again for the Senate. One can only imagine the joy and relief that this inspired in the state of Delaware and the entire United States.

W__AT A DU_BA__!

I could never watch Wheel of Fortune with all the congratulatory applauding oneself for having chosen a vowel. It's really insipid. But before watching Jeopardy, I usually catch the final puzzle. While doing this I was thinking what a funny and likable person Pat Sajak is. Pity I had to completely change my mind when I saw his stupid tweet today. Apparently he tweeted, "I now believe global warming alarmists are unpatriotic racists knowingly misleading for their own ends. Good night." What possible "own ends" could he mean with this really idiotic comment. I think it's better not to know too much about celebrities. Pat Sajak will never seem charming and amusing to me again. And I haven't been able to enjoy a Mark Wahlberg film since I learned he used to be a racist thug who would beat up people without being provoked.

More from the Looney Lone Star State.

Let me see if I understand this. George Bush, Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld and Condoleeza Rice are responsible for the deaths of  many thousands of young Americans soldiers and even more  Iraqi men, women and children, and they're completely free to do whatever they want and even get paid for speaking engagements. But a 19-year-old name Jacob Lavoro could spend his life in jail because he made and sold hash brownies which, unlike the crimes of the warmongers mentioned, did not kill, blind, maim, orphan, or widow anyone. Is this what America calls justice? Or is this just another sad example of the madness that is Texas?

Holding that mike near his mouth, may make him want to....

It's amazing how bone-headed stupid some people can be. Some people in this case is State Rep. Charles Van Zant who said the American Institute for Research, which has been assigned to develop Common Core-based tests for Florida are promoting programs that will turn children gay. If he had a fraction of a brain, he would know you can't turn anyone gay any more than you can change their eye color or DNA.  How do these ignorant fools get anywhere in life, much less involved in projects that require a degree of intelligence?

Say anything. The media don't care if it's true.

The lazy and irresponsible media is at it again. A nutcase Republican running for Arizona's 1st Congressional District, Gary Kiehne, says most mass shootings in the U.S. are committed by Democrats. Naturally the news media report this incendiary comment without spending one moment doing research. Why should they? It's a sound bite that's sure to arouse interest. Does it even matter if it's true? And if it is true, do the shootings have anything to do with politics?  How fortunate our society is for those among us who are rumormongers or politicians without any morals or standards. They know they can say any vicious thing they want in public and some desperate reporter will rush off to get it in the early news or late edition. Perry White is dead.

One man's family.

What a madhouse it must be at the Cheney household. Crazy Lynne is still pushing her Monica Lewinsky theory, but now she's added the absurdity that she meant it as a compliment. Nutty Dick has been let out in public to call Obama weak because he is not the kind of bully and overreacting asshole that Dick would be. Moderately sane Mary continues to be delusional and confident that her warmonger father has a heart of gold when he, in fact, has a heart that would have gone to someone much younger if Cheney hand't had enough gold necessary to misdirect it. And always-angry Liz, the depraved spawn of Dick and Lynne and far butcher than her sister still thinks she has a future in politics  despite being as appealing to the Wyoming voters as a coyote in a nursery.

A face only another bigot could love.

When I was a kid living in the ghetto area of Roxbury, Mass. my aunt graciously paid to send my mother, my two brothers and I to a resort in Wolfeboro, New Hampshire. It was called the Allen-A and I have wonderful memories of our two weeks in that gorgeous lakeside town.  Sadly, the name Wolfeboro, New Hampshire, has come up this week in an unpleasant way. Seems their police commissioner Robert Copeland is a racist who doesn't even have the sense to hold his vile tongue in public. After beng overheard using the N word to refer to our  president, he is arrogantly unapologetic and unwilling to resign his post despite requests from all over the country and most of the residents of Wolfeboro.  I have such pleasant memories of Wolfeboro. Pity such a beautiful town has to be fouled with such a large pile of excrement.

Good news. He was flushed away.

Miscarriage.

I was very unfair. I commented on the new mini-series Rosemary's Baby before I had seen it. I just assumed it would be another tepid copy of a great movie, with a weak script, second rate actors and unimaginative direction. Well I watched it last night. And I must say, it has a very weak script, second rate actors and unimaginative direction. The leads are pleasant enough, but eminentaly replaceable. The only standout performer is French actress and fashion model Carole Bouquet, who adds a lot of class to this production. The overrated Ms. Holland offers her usual dull direction and Sapphic touches throughout. Unlike Roman Polansky's masterpiece, this film does not have a moment of tension and instead of teasing us with terrifying suggestions, we are walloped with sickening scenes of bloodshed and savagery. Paris, beautiful as it is, adds nothing. Well, not true. While you're half-ignoring this predictable movie, you're thinking, "Hmm. I should really go to Paris again. What a beautiful city."

Finally, a tear.

Former President George W. Bush is very sad today. It seems Miss Beazley, his family dog died this week. I'm guessing that in the Bush household more tears will be spilled for the nine-year-old Scottish Terrier than were ever shed for the thousands of brave men and women who died in the phony war dreamed up by George and his warmongering pals. 

One of the year's dumbest commercials.

This has got to be one of the stupidest commercials of the year. Let's forget for the moment that it is so mushy and unbelievable, and look at the logic. In gathering the boxes the kids are exposing themselves to all kinds of dangers, not even addressing where they got these boxes. One kid is crossing the road with a box over his or her head. Duh. Then they create this maze of two-story cardboard with all kinds of opportunities to get hurt, cut on a staple, or caught in a collapsing structure. I really detest this kind of totally illogical fantasy positioned as a possible life scenario

Unbelievable.

This jackhammer operator may be a believer in Dr. Scholls insoles, but he's not very bright if he continues to operate that deafening jackhammer without protecting his ears. It seems to me if you're trying to go for realism, you might go a little further. On the other hand, I think that Dr. Scholls' products, for the most part, are a scam. So I'm not a believer, and I sure don't believe this guy is a construction worker.

Sadly, she won't fold her tent, however....

Just when you thought Michele Bachmann was a completely incompetent bible-thumping housewife living in the shadow of her vivacious homosexual husband, we learn she has a talent? Now, we know it's not for politics, or anything involving education, or raising children, or helping the poor and needy. And we know, with her phobia about being assaulted by another woman, it's nothing to do with the lesbian community. It turns out she's a whiz at folding napkins. Now while the cruel among us suggest she learned it as therapy in a mental health clinic, there's is no reason to believe that. So let us be happy and rejoice that this crazy-eyed harridan is a good at something.

Ding dong.

When I see the nasty and racist machinations of Cruz, Ryan, McCain and others, I feel very frustrated that no one can stop them. But there is a ray of light. Andrew Breitbart is dead. I find it very comforting that at least one of these vicious hatemongers is gone. There was only one reason for him to stay alive and that was to face a judge in Shirley Sherrod's lawsuit against him.

New tie. New chin.

I guess I'm not as nice a person as I thought I was. Because it gives me great pleasure to see how fat-faced Tucker Carlson has gotten. The last time I saw him, which was years ago, he still had that handsome, bow-tied, full-head-of-hair preppie look. Now he looks bloated and his chin has completely gone. If he were a nice person I wouldn't take such pleasure in his metamorphosis, but, well....

Will justice ever be served?

I think it's time we emptied our prisons of all those convicted of minor drug charges who were unfairly sentenced to years of servitude. And once we have all those empty jail cells, we should start rounding up and prosecuting those who should be in jail. Like all the crooked bankers; like murderous mine owner Don Blankship; like warmongers Dick Cheney, George Bush, Condoleeza Rice, and Donald Rumsfeld; and all the congressmen and senators who have been taking bribes, been feted by millionaires, and betrayed their constituents at every turn. Once all these lowlifes are safely behind bars, we can start rebuildng this country. Of course we may not be able to press charges against Issa, Boehner, Cruz, Cantor, and all those other traitors whose racist obsession has done so much destruction to our country, but hopefully we can vote them out.

Piyush pissed at Hillary.

It's begun. Every anemic little Repub is coming out whining. They are all so terrified of Hillary Clinton they are like besieged villagers tossing every item available at the frightening enemy. Piyush Jindal's ammo is that Hillary Clinton recently supported the individual mandate of Obamacre when two decades ago she testified against it.  As we all know Republicans are never allowed to change their minds and have no understanding of the idea of revising one's thinking. Poor little Piyush, this is all he can come up with for now. I'm sure he'll get further instructions in the near future.

CR=C

War criminal Condoleeza Rice to no one's surprise is all for the latest of the many, many redundant Benghazi investigations. She says, "I think there are still unanswered questions about Benghazi...and they could easily be answered. But I think they need to be answered." If Miss Rice likes having questions answered, perhaps she could tell us why she ignored a severe warning about an attack in America. Maybe she could answer this question" Why did you support a war you knew was fake? Or this: Don't you feel any remorse for the thousands of young Americans who died because you and your cronies lied them into going to Iraq?  And here's a question far more interesting than what happened in Benghazi: How did you, Bush, Cheney, and Rumsfeld—war criminals all—managed to stay out of prison when that is so obviously where you should all be spending the rest of your shameful  lives?

"Miss, would you date me?"

I like women, especially for sex, but don't think they are
equal to men.

I don't approve of you using birth control of any kind.

If you were raped by a psychopathic maniac, I would want you
to have the baby.

I don't like blacks, hispanics, or really any ethnic group.

I think we should bomb all Muslim countries.

I really hate gay people and think their marrying is disgusting.

I believe in an all-powerful god so hate atheists.

I think if you're poor, it's your own fault.

I don't think it's our job to feed starving children.

I consider myself a very loyal Republican.

Mad at the world. And just plain mad.

Talk about dodging a bullet; we probably dodged thousands of bombs by not electing John McCain president. This is a guy who is ready to go to war at the drop of a hat. Imagine what a warmonger he would have been with that nutcase Sarah Palin at his side. Just this week he encouraged the U.S. to send in special forces to rescue the hundreds of girls kidnapped by Boko Haram—whether the Nigerian government gives permission of not.  With him at the helm, we would have had forces in Syria, troops in Nigeria, battles in any other country that looked cross eyed at us,  and still be fighting the wars he hated saying goodbye to. We called this one right. Now if only Gore had been president instead of Bush.

Rafael, Randall, and Piyush.

When Obama was running for president, and even after he was elected, Republicans thought they could diminish him by referring to him as Barry, his nickname,  or his middle name Hussein. I think we should use that same kind of system on Republicans who think they can be president, and will always refer to Ted Cruz by his first name Rafael,  Rand Paul by his first name Randall (which sounds so effete) and Bobby Jindal by his real name, Piyush.

A proud two hours.

One of my greatest joys is one of my great disappointments. Over a lifetime I have written three screenplays (never produced), four musicals (one was produced in California) one teen romance novel (published) more than 70 short plays (home produced with a few random productions elsewhere). But the project I take the most pride in is my only straight play, The Gray List. I feel that it is the best thing I have ever written. Fortunately some others admired it, too, and it received two productions in New York City by the American Theater of Actors. Each fully staged production (one five performances, the other 12) took place at the Sargent Theatre near Times Square which gave one the illusion of being on Broadway rather than off. While the attendance was light, no one ever walked out and I got rave reviews from those who attended. Here's the disappointment part. I have sent out this play to dozens of theaters, including several here in Miami. I have had rejections from most, praise along with rejections from some, and zero response from Miami producers who I suspect don't even read scripts. It's a mystery to me why The Gray List is not being produced. But I suspect I am just one of hundreds of playwrights who cannot imagine why their inspired script is being ignored when so much mediocrity is being not only produced but praised.

Above: The superb cast of the 2013  production of The Gray List (L to R) Kitty Hendrix, Marilyn Duryea, Vincent Ianuzzi, Alan Charney, and Thomas J. Kane.

Karl's plaything.

That bitchy nasty old queen, Karl Rove, is at it again. He's got all kinds of lies prepared to vilify Hillary Clinton. I hope he realizes that the more he creates rumors about powerful Democrats, bloggers like me will be bring up his actual affair with Jeff Gannon, a male hustler that he not only hired on a regular basis, but managed to get into press meetings. Jeff Gannon, posing as a journalist attended 155 White House press briefings. He also made more than twenty-four visits to the White House ostensibly to see the john that hired him (who could that be?). During many of those visits he was checked in, but never processed out.  I see Karl now as  the witch he is, spinning his evil tales, cackling with glee, but at the same time wishing he wasn't a tubby, bald old misanthrope who has to pay for his most secret pleasures.

Feeling her oats?

That madcap hollow-eyed Republican with the horse face, too-young hairstyle and cocktail dress mania is at again. But this time she was caught in her own nasty trap. It seems that Ann Coulter tweeted a photo of her equine sourness holding up a sign that said "Bring back our country" as a rebuttal to the serious "#BringBackOurGirls." Well, the visual has gone viral with any number of messages on Annie's little sign. I have included my favorite since I am sure it is one that may make her whinny the loudest.

"This is where the body was laying after he drug it away."

After years of watching true crime programming, I have to believe that police officers and detectives are among the most illiterate of professions. They almost never seem to know the difference between laying and lying, and they all seem to be under the impression that drug is a past tense of drag. I admire the crime-fighting work they do, but I wish they would pursue the English language with more zeal.

Another one bites the dust.

Every year some arrogant director or producer or both think they can improve on a classic film. Usually the project is greeted with fanfare and never lives up to its promise. Despite it being far inferior to the original, it becomes the film that is frequently shown, while the classic is seldom seen. This has happened with Raisin in the Sun, Pyscho, The Out of Towners, The Manchurian Candidate and now Rosemary's Baby. It would be impossible to find a more vulnerable Rosemary than Mia Farrow, a more ambivalent husband than John Cassavetes, a more fascinating villain than Ruth Gordon and an eerier setting than the Dakota in New York City. From what I saw of the new film, it's a typical TV movie, but lacks any of the skill and brilliance that went into the original movie. No matter. That's the one they'll be showing from now on. Hopefully true lovers of cinema will seek out the original 1968 Roman Polanski film for a truly chilling movie experience.

Note: How do people get to be reviewers? A certain Tom Gliatto for People wrote of Rosemary's Baby, "It's directed by Angnieszka Holland, who has shown a very skillful and sensitive hand in readapting familiar stories before, such as 1997s Washington Square). Sorry, Tom, that was one of the most boring remakes of a story so good I would have thought it was flop-proof.

Not even close.

While shopping this week, I spent $3.99 for a spray can of febreze Mediterranean Lavender. It smells nice enough. But it doesn't smell anything like lavender. Actually I'm surprised that I bought a febreze product since I think they are very guilty of false advertising. For instance, febreze does not eliminate odors. It masks them just like every other air freshener. Now I will avoid them because you can't even trust the fancy names they give their scents. I'll bet the other can I bought called "rain"
doesn't smell anything like rain.

A must read, a must act-upon.

As much as I love Elizabeth Warren, I was reluctant to purchase her book A Fighting Chance. I was concerned that it would be another slog from a brilliant financial person and political figure. I figured if I bought it, it would end up on the shelf, half-read, with all those other intellectual tomes by people  I admire but don't enjoy reading. Wrong! It is a page-turner of a biography that is every bit as involving, amusing and moving as you would expect from someone as pro people and passionate as her. I love Hillary Clinton and hope she is our next president, but if there is any woman on the public stage that I admire as much it is Elizabeth Warren who is doing everything within her power to give Americans what they do not now have: a fighting chance.

Two twerps and a tweet.

George Will, an old fool who regards himself as the wisest man who ever lived, and Chris Wallace, the dissapointing issue of trenchant Mike Wallace, had fun this week ridiculing those persons who are tweeting, "Bring back our girls". As part of a panel of Fox News (who else?) contributors they mocked the #BringBackOurGirls hashtag on Sunday as being a useless "exercise in self-esteem". While these two cynics smiled with moronic self-satisfaction, the entire world now knows about this terrifying situation which could have remained a local horror.  I suspect that cold-hearted people like Will and Wallace secretly hope that the 276 girls are never rescued from Boko Haram so they can feel justified in their smug certainty. 

Shiny but not bright.

I cannot believe that of all people Marco Rubio, the moon-faced boy, is a climate change denier. I knew he wasn't smart, but assumed he would at least have enough sense to know that Miami is right in the bull's eyes of climate change. But he actually said, "I do not believe that human activity is causing these dramatic changes in our climate the way these scientists are portraying it," and added, "I do not believe that the laws that they propose we pass will do anything about it, except it will destroy our economy." These Republicans want to be taken seriously then they make idiotic comments like that.

Note: It gets even funnier. I cannot believe that Rubio actually said this week that he is ready to be president. President of what? This guy is an arrogant fool, Another reason I've got to get out of Florida.