Birther=Bigot

In case anybody is as confused as I am about this citizenship issue, here's what I learned. I assumed that if you were born of an American mother you were naturally a U.S. citizen. This is true. But apparently to become president both parents must be U.S citizens if you were born outside the United States.(McCain was born Panama, but both parents were citizens.)  Ergo: If Obama was born in Hawaii, he's eligible. If he were born in Kenya, he's not because his father was not a U.S. citizen. Stupid rule. But that's why nutcases like Donald Trump and Orly Taitz are so eager to find any evidence that he was born in Kenya. Assuming they believe this crap, are they really outraged that Obama would not have qualified to be president. Of course not. They like millions of other American are upset by one thing and one thing only: He's part African American. The hate campaign against Obama began on day one, so it has nothing to do with any governing policies. These, and anyone clinging to birtherism, are bigots and racists, pure and simple—although Orly Taitz is also a mental case.

A criminal in Congress.

I find most national news to be shallow and lazy, so I shouldn't be surprised to see CNN conduct an interview with convicted car thief and arsonist, Darrell Issa,  speaking with him as if he were not the thug that he is.  Naturally every question they asked about Romney was  met with an obsequious comment that suggested that the vacuous and amoral Willard would be a better president than the brilliant and humane Obama. There were, however,  a few interesting surprises in this insipid interview. The interviewer—unless I heard wrong—suggested that Issa was worth 100 billion dollars and Issa did not correct him. Issa himself made several embarrassing mistakes. He used the word pundint, always the mark of an ill-educated parvenu. But even dumber he commented that John Kennedy always carried a in his pocket something he had received from his father: a telegraph!  I can't imagine how this low-life criminal managed to crawl into the halls of Congress, but now that he's there he leaves his slime everywhere he goes.

Oh, Oh, Oh, What a Lovely War!

Today is Memorial Day, which means lots of war films and military concerts and specials glorifyng soldiers. And lots of use of the expression I detest: "fallen soldiers". They are not fallen, they are dead. Maybe they fell to their death, but they are not fallen and using that euphemism doesn't make them any more dead. It just makes the military feel more justified in sending these kids off to be slaughtered. There are times of course when it's justified. World War II was one of those times. Iraq was not. It was a stupid, unnecessary ego-driven war created by Dick Cheney, his idiotic puppet George Bush and other evil pricks.  Afghanistan was also unnecessary. As if invading a country that allowed a terrorist group training grounds that led to 9-11 was reason enough to send still more thousands of Americans into this hellhole to be killed or maimed made any sense. It doesn't. But as long as people love killing each other, and they do, we will have wars and conflicts and skirmishes and massacres like the one in Syria this week. And so the evil warmongers can keep enjoying their favorite sport, they will try to glamorize the deaths of those who are forced to fight these wars by having parades and concerts and waving flags not for "dead kids' but for "fallen soldiers".

Hey, Jesus, is this what you meant?

The New Testament encourages people to shun wealth, love thy neighbor, be a Good Samaritan, cast your bread upon the waters, judge not lest ye be judged, and all kinds of other neat ideas for people to live together in peace. Of course any sane person will note that these are virtues one can practice at home or just about any place without significant instruction. But along the way Catholic clerics decided that people couldn't follow the teachings of Jesus unless they were taught how in costly churches, cathedrals and—wonder of wonders—St. Peter's in Rome, the Rolls Royce of churches. And no ordinary teachers like the drably robed Jesus would do. No you needed to have someone in luxurious vestments, with gold trimmed mitres, carrying jeweled crosses swishing down thickly embroidered carpets in the glow of million dollar stained-glassed windows And it had to be a man. Not because Jesus said so, but just because.  Of course all this pageantry doesn't come cheap, so these clever developers of religion also devised the collection plates and—even better—tithing. What a concept. Now they not only had money for elaborate churches, but enough left over so the priests could travel around in the latest cars, drink the finest wine, dine in the best restaurants, sleep on the finest beds beneath the finest linens. And in many cases, you could even invite a young lad to share your bed for being such a diligent and discreet altar boy. Of course there is some work involved. I mean just getting dressed is a chore. Then you have to listen to all those salacious confessions. And, of course, you have to remain celibate (wink, wink). And convincing all those poor people to stop practicing birth control is a job in itself. But the good news is that nobody seems to have caught on to this scam. The Vatican is still rolling in money. Catholic churches all over the world still seem to be busy and those collection plates still get filled. And people are still going hungry and homeless and dying from treatable diseases. So isn't it nice to know that if it's raining in Rome the Pope's butler is holding an umbrella over his precious head so it won't get wet.

Note: Coming from Boston, I was always amazed when I went to any expensive restaurant how many priests were dining there and having wine. Knowing how much the bill would be, it seemed to me that they—men of God—would rather spend that money on Boston's poor, of which here were many. Ah,

the naivete of youth. 

The Last Gaspers

This is Joe Ricketts, the latest elderly, overweight, old fool out to destroy Obama. They are coming at our president full force: an army of white-haired billionaire bigots, each with a "cunning plan that cannot fail" to defeat President Obama in the fall. This nitwit's brainstorm was a film titled The Roots of Obama's 
Rage, trying once again to tie Obama to Reverend Wright, a plot so transparently stupid that even Mr. Cellophane, Mitt Romney, nixed it. Especially since any mention of religion would open the eighty-foot steel doors of Mitt's Mormon citadel not to mention his underwear drawer. When I get pessimistic about the upcoming election, all I have to do is remind myself that most of Obama's detractors seem to be wealthy and close-to-senile old men, Scrooge McDucking their wealth because they're afraid two billion dollars won't last the eight years of life they have left. Besides they'd like to go to their graves, crypts or vases with the happy thought that they successfully kept ordinary people ordinary. Ricketts, of course, is far from ordinary since he is part owner of the Chicago Cubs and had a distinguished career as a securities officer and purveyor of bison meat. And while he is only 70 (though he looks
older)  his kind of inner rage and anger happily does men in before eighty. (In Breitbart's case, long before.)

P.S. I particularly like that his name is nearly the same as a disease caused by a Vitamin D deficiency and that his daughter is not only a lesbian but works of President Obama.

Unnecessary murders.

I like Lifetime movies. There! I've admitted it. I like their mysteries, their murders, their evil characters. I think they hire good directors, excellent art directors, very good actors—some familiar, some new faces to me. Rarely do I see a Lifetime movie that I think was poorly conceived or produced. On the other hand, most of them are not something you think about for weeks or want to add to your permanent collection. But Lifetime has every reason to be proud of their products. Except for one thing. Well, two things really. Far too many of their mystery scripts rely on killing a pet and/or the heroine's best friend. This gets pretty sickening, especially the pet part. If the innocent protagonist has an adorable dog or a soft and purry kitty like Lindsy Crouse's in Total Stranger you can be pretty sure the villain will have killed it in some hideous and vengeful way before the film's end. If she has a true-blue pal like the adorable best friend on Murder on the 13th Floor, you can bet this innocent will be killed by the heartless intruders who mistake her for the intended victim. These two- and four-legged victims are becoming a tiresome cliche in Lifetime movies. I would complain, but there seems to be no way to communicate with Lifetime. I wonder why. You would think a network like theirs would want to get feedback from their viewers. Apparently not. I wrote to PETA about the pets. Don't know what to do to save the lives of the best friends.

Note: It is now May 28th. I just saw another Lifetime Movie titled Unthinkable. Another very good film, but unfortunately, once again, they slaughtered a pet cat for absolutely no truly necessary reason. What is wrong with these writers?

This is the face of a liar, a fraud, a man who doesn't have a clue how to run this country. He was born rich and given all the opportunities that scions receive. As we now know, he was a practical joker and a bully.He made most of his money working for Bain, a company that bought up troubled companies, fired most of the employees, demolished pension plans, and then sold out for as much money as they could carry off—never wondering about the damage they left behind. This charlatan has a wife he supposedly loves, but obviously doesn't wish to spend much time with if he is vying for president. Why use your multi-millions traveling the world with your sweetheart when you can find an excuse to be away from her most of he time? Of course she's a fraud, too. A spoiled Cadillaced socialite so unaware of the real world that recently when she attempted to bond with middle-class American women she was wearing a thousand dollar tee-shirt, Americans can be incredibly brilliant or amazingly stupid (two terms for Bush!) but if they put this goofball in office, it will probably be our biggest mistake yet. Don't click off till you've looked at that face one more time.

Popularity contest?

I don't get Facebook. I signed up ages ago, decided I didn't care where a hundred casual friends had dinner the night before and signed off. I soon realized that they don't let you go. Soon Facebook requests were showing up on my HuffPost posts, and in other areas of my computer usage. Today I got a list of more than 40 people who seem to want me to be friends with them. I don't know why. I detest at least 15 of them and they have never shown any liking for me, so what do they want? Just to increase their number of friends on this absurd social website?  Most of the others are complete strangers to me. I'm sure some of them are very nice people, but I have no interest in where they went for vacation, how well they are doing at work, and life is already filled with too many baby and child pictures to welcome even more. I'm sure there's something I'm missing. All those exciting contests that tell you what movie star you're most compatible with or at what age you're most likely to die?  But I don't really care. Bless the nerd that came up with this gimmick and made 100 million dollars. I prefer to communicate with people who have something to say, or an interesting opinion on a subject, any subject. I think that's something I offer. But I admit that very few people seem to care or even read me. I might even be better off telling a thousand pseudo friends on Facebook what I had for dinner last night. But I think I'll just keep doing what I'm doing.

Every day I see hundreds of commercials (and that's usually during one show) which I don't even understand. They are usually costly, complicated, and often have more than one expensive talent. Not only don't I understand many of them, but they often reflect a very old idea or are imitative of someone else's idea. The point is they don't work, at least not for me. But there is one commercial out there today which I think is absolutely brilliant in its writing and its simplicity. Unfortunately I cannot find it on YouTube to include with this post. The spot is for Goodwill Industries and shows a young man in front of an open closet. He points out, wisely, that there are clothes you wear, clothes you don't wear, clothes you can't wear, and clothes you shouldn't wear. Pushing all the unworn clothes to the side, he suggests you donate them to Goodwill so that you will have more room in your closet for the clothes you do wear. Simple. Dirt cheap. One talented actor. And a clearly stated brilliant script that does what it's supposed to do. That's advertising at its best. And all those million-dollar, special effects commercial pale in comparison.

Simply Irresistible

A friend asked me why I included this video. No reason other than that I think it's great and the girl in the yellow dress is fabulous.
This entire show, Contact, was a TV special and featured three fabulous dance sequences of which this was one. I don't know why the didn't issue a DVD, which I would have bought in a minute, but they didn't. Fortunately, we have this on YouTube.

"They don't say Magic, till I say they say Magic."

In case you were curious, this is what Mormon Magic Underwear looks like. Apparently it's a very hot, one-piece arrangement. I have read that many liberal Mormons have switched to two-piece garments.Apparently there is a ceremony that goes with the presentation of your undies when you are 19. I don't know whether you can get a second pair, but have heard these are pretty much tailored for life. What's the purpose? Well, to remind you of Satan's power, to protect your modesty, and to keep you from all kinds of worldly harm. So when you see Romney making speeches, picture that underneath his $1000-plus suits is this fetching little garment, acting as both his tidy whities and bulletproof vest (if you believe in its  protective powers). For even more fun, when his whole family is lined up giving him their support, try to visual every one of them, including Ann standing there in their Magic Underwear. Kinda reminds me of the old Sears catalog.

"Of all sad words of tongue and pen..." Whittier

You know who's responsible for the state the country's in? Well, George Bush and Dick Cheney of course. But also every person who had a hand in stealing the election from Al Gore after he won—and that includes all those bullies who showed up in Florida, that overly made-up Floridian witch and, of course, The Supreme Court. If Al Gore had been given the presidency that he won, we never would have gone to war with Iraq.  9-11 would probably still have happened, but with a sane adult holding the reins who knows how different things would have been. Thousands of now-dead soldiers would be with their families. Those who are maimed, blind, deaf, burned would not have suffered those fates. Much more would have been done about the environment. America never would have been cursed with Sarah Palin.  Gore would have been much better at dealing with Katrina. We wouldn't have incurred the world-anger that Bush delivered to us with his torture and spying. We would have a more reasoned Supreme Court. In short, we would all be better off. Think about it. Anyone can come with reasons all our lives would be greatly if Al Gore had been given the presidency he won and if American didn't cave to the Republican bullies and hand our country over to a bumbling clown and his evil puppet master.

Josh Groban - You Raise Me Up

There are many versions of this song on YouTube. Some people proclaim in the most beautiful song they have ever heard. And, while Josh Groban, has a great voice, I think this song sucks. For starters, it's just a rip-off of Danny Boy, which is one of the most beautiful songs ever written. But, unlike Danny Boy, the lyrics in this song are insipid. "You raise me up so I can stand on mountains." is something you can do anyway. "You raise me up to walk on stormy seas." is something nobody can do. "I am strong when I am on your shoulders."Shoulder would have been a better lyric as shoulders suggests straddling someone's head. And finally, "You raise me up to more than I can be." Nobody can raise you up to more than you can be. They can raise you up to more than you thought you could be. But then the meter wouldn't fit the stolen Danny Boy. I find much-acclaimed claptrap like this incredibly offensive. Partly because it's so bad, but mostly because it reminds me of just what kind of sentimental shit people fall for.

Real pains.

Bayer's goal for the past 50 years seems to be to convince consumers that their high-priced aspirin is more effective than the far, far less costly brands, which are more or less identical. Well, it isn't. Their newest campaign, not shown here, is that they are reinforming us that aspirin is for pain, as if we didn't know it. The Bayer company is one of the most greedy, dishonest pharmaceutical and poison companies in the industry. When they're not trying to convince you that their pills cure a heart attack, they are charging you a fortune to de-flea your pets. I never get tired of reminding anyone reading this that Bayer was the German company that supplied the poisons for the holocaust. So many of the American Jews who wouldn't think of buying a German car or going to Berlin for vacation have no idea of this company's despicable past. One could argue that those running the company today are far removed from the operators of more than 60 years ago, making today's Bayer somewhat forgivable if they weren't such lying charlatans.  Unfortunately YouTube doesn't have the Bayer commercial where the man on the plane asks the stewardess for a pain reliever. When she offers him Bayer aspirin, he says, "I'm not having a heart attack" suggesting that Bayer is the instant cure for cardiac arrest. You don't get more dishonest than that.

Somebody got paid to write this?

I see a lot of bad writing in advertising. There are grammatical errors, misspells, and thoughts that just don't fit together. But today I think I saw the worst written headline ever. It was on a Metrorail poster promoting an anti-litter campaign. The visual was of an Asian girl in the foreground and in the background two Anglo young women. All three were irrelevant to the message. The following headline is so clumsy, so inept, so badly phrased, I am amazed that any advertiser accepted it, much less printed it on hundreds of posters. Are you ready? Here it is:

MY NEWSPAPER WON'T BE YOUR SEAT COVER ON MY TRAIN.

TV: Let's Put America's Oil & Natural Gas Resources to Work for Americans

 This woman is the Tokyo Rose of advertising. She's an amoral shill for the billionaire polluters who are eager to frack our landscapes, blow up our scenic mountains, and ruin the environment everywhere they bring their dirty equipment. She doesn't care that she's pushing for companies to poison drinking water, pollute rivers, curse children with cancer, and destroy much of America all for the almighty dollar. She may be attractive, well-spoken, seemingly credible. But basically she's a traitor to her country.